Revalations of an Unfamiliar Kind
by UsedLove
Summary: Buffy is faced with making a choice, will she choose Spike or Angel?
1. The basement

Revalations of an unfamiliar kind.  
  
Buffy walked down into her basement carrying a mug of blood. "Hey," she said to spike who was laying on his bed. "Hey, yourself," he replied standing up. "That for yours truly?" he asked pointing to the blood, "or were you planning on having an afternoon snack?" "Yeah, sorry, a little out of it, guess i'm just worried about the big day," Buffy said looking down but then back up. "I wouldn't stress on it, love. You have saved the day lots of times, why should this one be any different?" Spike said taking the mug. "I know, it's just..." she started but spike cut in, "I know...." "There are just so many things i would like to tell everyone...i mean, we don't know if we're gonna survive this but, it's just some things I can't say..." she said and looked down. "Sometimes the harder it is to say, the more important it is," spike said leaning against the wall. "When did you become mr. wise?" Buffy said doing a half smile. "I have a lot of free time down here to think," he said taking a sip, "I've changed a lot over the past year, grew up, I guess..." "I am begining to notice that," she said senserely, "I wish I could be as upfront as you are." "What do you mean, love?" he said tilting his head slightly. "I mean, you realized you had feelings for me, and you just went on and told me, even when you knew I wouldn't understand," she said starting to pace. "It didn't really go down like that, pet," he began, "believe me, I did a lot of practicing, as corny as it sounds," he said, "and I really didn't want to believe it myself but now, I can't imagine my life without you, even if I don't have you the way I wanted...it's good enough." She smiled, tears forming. She looked down to hide them. Spike walked over to her, placed his hand under her chin, and raised her head level with his, "You are an increadible woman, you know?" he said and moved his hand from her chin to rest it on her cheek. "After all the terrible things I've done to you, you still let me into your life. I will always respect you for that." A tear fell down her cheek. "Buffy?" Dawn's voice came from upstairs. "Go on," spike said letting his hand fall from her cheek, "...they need you." "I need you," she said not moving. "We'll wait till after we save the world," he said, "you gotta go play hero." Buffy started to say something but the sound of breaking glass and Dawn's voice screaming "Andrew you dork!!!" stopped her, and with one last look behind her she hurried up the stairs. 


	2. Willow and Spike

Revalations of an unfamiliar kind. chapter 2.  
  
(i forgot to do the disclamer for the first chapter, so here goes: I do not own any of the characters in this story, they belong to the wonderful man who gave us Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Joss Whedon)  
  
"What is going on up here it sounds like there's a tornado in here!" Buffy yelled at the others. "The stupid dork knocked over the urn of whatcha-ma-call-its that willow was using! It ruined her spell!" Dawn yelled shooting Andrew a nasty look. "What kind of spell?" Buffy asked feeling left out. "oh, just a protection spell for the house..." Willow said looking sheepishly at Buffy, "nothing big." Spike walked into the room, "What's all the fuss about? Guy can't even get a good days sleep around here." "it's him!" Dawn said pointing at Andrew. "I said I was sorry..." Andrew said looking worridly at Willow, he still didn't trust her. "Let's just clean the mess up and calm down, ok?" Buffy said reasonably. "Oh, Buffy, I was meaning to talk to you about something, someone took the last hot pocket again, and I had my name on it too!" Andrew said whilingly. "Call out the bloody cavalry," Spike said to Andrew's coment. A small smile formed on Buffy's face. She snapped back into leader mode, "We have a long day ahead of us, Xander I need you to go to see if you can find anything about the first that we haven't read, Dawn go order some pizza, Willow see if you can find another one of those urn things..." Xander cut in, "Check on Ebay!" Willow opened up her laptop. "Spike," Buffy continued, "get some sleep, me and you are going patroling tonight." Spike nodded, "You should get some rest yourself, you look exhauseted..." "I'll sleep, but I got some errands to run first..." Buffy began but Spike cut in, "I mean it..." he said seriously, "get some rest..." Buffy nodded. "The errends can wait," Spike concluded and turned to go downstairs. "Spike," Buffy said and spike turned to look at her, "do you dream... i mean, do vampire's dream?" Spike nodded. "Well, sweet dreams, then," Buffy said and walked off leaving Spike standing there. He turned to go down stairs but heard Willow's voice behind him say, "You love her, right?" He turned to face her, "Yeah..." "Then, don't break her heart," Willow began, "We both know she has...feelings for you, but you may not survive this...don't start something you can't finish..." Willow said and walked off. Spike looked down, then walked downstairs into the basement, Willow's words repeating in his ears. 


	3. the first's visit

chap. 3 Spike stood in the basement thinking about what Willow had said. He began to pace."Why is everyone so afraid that Buffy and me are going to get back together...she doesn't love me, I realize that now,"he thought to himself. "You're gonna make a dent in the ground with all that pacing..."Dawn said walking down the steps, "Penny for your thoughts..." "Hey, niblit, how long you been standing there?" he said looking up. "Long enough to figure out you've got something on your mind," she answered. "It's nothing...just thinking about the battle," he said leaning against the wall. "I heard what Willow said..." Dawn stated getting to the point. "Oh, you did, did ya?" he said looking away, "eves dropping, I see the old Dawn hasn't quite left." Dawn put on her 'serious' face as she walked into the middle of the basement, "We trust you, it's just we're all a little on edge because of the war...she didn't mean it..." "Yeah, I know it's really hectic.."he said looking back at her, "You should eat something..." "Just about to, I just wanted to make sure you're ok," Dawn said taking a step closer. "I've been through torment and torture in my life, 'bit, this isn't..."he started but Dawn cut in, "But words can hurt ten-times that much...believe me, I know..." Dawn said and walked up the stairs stopping at the door, "she does care about you, she might not love you, but she does care." Then Dawn walked through the door and closed it behind her leaving Spike with nothing but his thoughts, and some new ones. "She's just trying to make you feel better, you know," the first in the form of Buffy said walking out of the shadows, "You know she doesn't love you...the slayer could never love you...she only keeps you around because she needs someone to use the trinket..." "Sod off," he said not looking at it, "I know what you are, and I know you can't do anything but taunt people." spike said and Dawn's voice rang in his ears "But words can hurt ten-times that much...." "She won't choose you, in the end...she won't choose you..." the first said and disappeard. Spike walked upstairs to find sun flowing through one of the windows blocking him from getting out of the basement, "Anyone wanna help a fella?" he called out but no one answered, "Hello, anyone home?" "They're not there," the first's voice said again. "Don't you have anything better to do rather than sit in a bloody basement with someone who could care less about you?" Spike said turning to look down the stairs where he saw the six year old girl he had killed before he had come back to Sunnydale. "This is suposed to hurt me," Spike said mockingly, "You're a little girl, with a dolly, and a bow...not really you're best work." "You killed my mommy, right in front of me...then you killed me...you could've killed me first but see, that's what's different about you, you love causing as much pain as possible before killing your victims," the girl said and she became Drusilla, "You always were one for the heartache, that's what the stars told me when I saw you in the ally that night..." the first said then taking the form of Buffy, "that's why you stuck around me...the heartache...you spent all your time telling me I loved to be hurt, to notice it was really you that did." "SHUT UP, YOU'RE NOT HER!!!!" he screamed loosing his temper.  
  
About two hours later Buffy arived back at the house and saw the basement door was opened. "Spike?" she called out. Then she walked to the basement door and looked in, seeing Spike huddled in a corner and herself talking to him. "You are pathetic," she heard the first saying to him, "...you are weak, and always were, you came to Sunnydale just so I would hurt you! and you stayed here! you pathetic little...." Buffy cut it off, "Hey, it's not nice to lie." "You..." it said to Buffy and then kneeled next to Spike, "We'll finish our little chat later." It disappeard as Buffy walked down to Spike, "You ok?" Spike stood up, "Yeah, i'm fine...just a little bored, been down here listening to the thing ramble on for about two hours..." "Why didn't you go upstairs and watch tv?" she asked him. "couldn't, the sun was blocking the way..." he said and walked up the stairs and stopped at the door seeing the sun wasn't blocking the way anymore so he went into the kitchen. Buffy stayed behind, "He put on a brave face but that's all it was, you know," the first said and Buffy walked past it, "figured that one out on my own, thanks" she said and walked out of the basement. 


	4. The choice

chapter 4 The Choice  
  
Buffy tossed and turned in her bed. Buffy's dream: Buffy is walking through a dark hallway looking around causiously. "Buffy, you have come to us through the orders of our master," a shadowy figure said from the distance, "follow me..." he said and then began walking. Buffy followed couriously, "What are you?" she asked as they entered a white room, but he was gone, "hello?" she said looking around. "Hello," a man whereing a white robe said coming into veiw, "My name is Incass, I am one of the gods of choice." "ok...what you wanna cookie?" Buffy said impatiently. "Inapropriate humor, that is most delightful," Incass said sarcastically. "Why did you bring me here?" she asked. "I have a choice for you, that only you must decide," he said starting to explain, "You must choose which souled vampire will be given this gift." "I'm guessing the gift isn't a cookie, huh?" she said. "The vampire you choose will be given the gift of life, he will become human and forever have your love," he stated, "but think hard on this, it should go to the one who needs it most." Buffy awoke sweaty and entangled in the sheets, "Why couldn't it have been a cookie?"  
  
She walked down into the basement later that morning to find Spike asleep on his cot. She stared and caught herself smiling at the sight. She had, in fact, developed feelings for Spike over the time he'd been around but knew it wasn't love, at least not yet, maybe not ever. She still couldn't make the dicision even though she thought it would be easy, only a few months ago she would have had the answer decided right on the spot, but as she had told him before, she knew he was a good man, and she believed in him. She turned to walk out but his voice caught her, "enjoying the veiw, love," Spike asked groggily. "You caught me," she said raising a hand, "gilty for staring at you, it's just you looked kinda puppy-like laying there asleep." She smiled dropping her hand. "Hey!" he said jokingly, "way to make a man feel good, tell him he looks like a puppy, thanks alot, slayer." "Anytime," Buffy replied, "we got some breakfast, hungry?" Spike shook his head, "Better leave the yummies for those who actually need it, like you." "I'm fine, Spike, don't worry so much," she said and walked out taking a quick glance back at him before closing the door. Buffy leaned against the closed door, sliding down it into a sitting possition, "Why is it always me with the hard choices?" 


	5. Falling apart

Chapter 5 Falling apart.  
  
Buffy sat listening to the gang and the potentials arguing about fighting strategy but her mind lay elsewhere. "So, what do you think Buff?" Xander asked looking at her. "Huh." she said snapping back into reality, "sorry.I just.I can't do this right now." She got up and walked out of the room. She walked up the stairs into her room and sat in a corner feeling overwhelmed; she began to cry into her hands. "What's wrong, love?" Spike said walking up, stopping at the door. He had a look of sincere worry on his face. She looked up at him with lines down her cheek from her make-up, "Nothing.please just go away." He walked into the room and kneeled before her, "Come on, love, since when have I left when told to." Her tears streamed down her face harder and she through herself into a hug with him, ".Spike.I.I," she sobbed, "I can't do this." "It's ok, pet," he said a little taken aback, ".I'm here." She sobbed into his shoulder. Spike's eyes tearing up a little too, "I'll always be here." Xander walked up to the door to check on Buffy but stopped at the sight of her and Spike. He stared for a minute and then turned slowly and walked downstairs. "Was Buffy ok?" Willow asked when he walked back down to them. "No." he said sadly, "I don't think she ever was."  
  
Buffy woke up on her bed; someone had taken off her shoes for her and tucked her in. She began to remember the happenings of that night. She had cried for what seemed like an eternity then she fell asleep in Spike's arms, again. "The dead have arisen," Spike said from a chair in the corner, she had not noticed him due to lack of eye sight, her eyes where red and swollen and stinged slightly. "Look who's talking," she said sitting up, "Sorry about last night, I guess everything finally got to me." "Don't fret, love," he replied, "I'd have been worried about you if it hadn't." She smiled slightly, "Thank you, Spike," she said, her eyes softening, "I couldn't have done any of this without you." "Yeah you could've," he said, "You got Willow and the whelp, and you can't forget Giles and niblit." "Yeah, but you're just as important to me as them. You're my strength, don't get me wrong I love the others, but you were always the one who gave me the strength to keep going.and I'm sorry, I love you," Buffy replied standing up and walking over to Spike, "but I'm not in love with you." She had tears in her eyes as she said it, "I wish I could be.and I don't know why I'm not.but I just can't." "I know you don't." he said tears in his eyes, "I guess I.I guess I always knew."  
  
Later on the two sat in the living room with the scoobies as Dawn and the potentials slept; Spike leaned against a wall and Buffy sat on the couch. They were both avoiding eye contact with the other. Buffy stared at her coke on the table and Spike stared at the floor, they both where thinking of the things said earlier that day. They all sat, an awkward, uneasy silence falling over them. 


	6. words of a key

Chapter 6 Words of a key.  
  
"We're not all going to make it," Buffy spoke breaking the silence; everyone looked at her even Spike, "So, if there's anything that needs to be said.say it now, because we might not see each other again after this." Xander looked at Spike, "Spike," he forced himself to say, "We both know we can't stand each other, but I just want you to know.I appreciate the things you've done for Buffy, just.thanks." Spike nodded understanding. Buffy smiled at Xander's words. "Buffy," Spike said looking down, "I'm sorry for all the stupid things I've done to you and yours.you always let me back in.and I will always be grateful." He trailed off. "I'm glad I did." she replied. Willow walked over to Xander, "I love you.you saw me, when no one else did.thank you." Tears fell down her cheeks. "I love you too, Will." Xander replied giving her a hug. Willow walked over to Spike, "I'm sorry we didn't give you a chance.everyone deserves a second chance.I should know, I tried to end the world and they forgave me.I'm so sorry for ever distrusting you." "Hey, no worries, Red," he said and smiled slightly. She smiled and then walked over to Buffy with tears streaming down her cheeks. She hugged her. Buffy began to cry too. "I love you so much, you have always been there for me, and you never judged me.when everyone else did." Willow said but had to stop to fight back the tears. "I love you too, Will, you are an amazing person.and an amazing friend." Buffy said. Willow walked back to where she had stood before. Buffy walked over to Giles, "You've been like a father to me, you are my real father in my book." Giles looked down, also fighting back tears, ".Thank you." he managed to say. Dawn walked into the room, "My turn." she said looking around. Buffy nodded not even saying a word about how late it was. "Spike," Dawn said walking over to him, "you've been both a brother and a father to me.you treated me like an adult when everyone else didn't.and I always felt safer with you than anyone else." ".Take that back" he replied joking about a former conversation they had had. Dawn smiled as tears filled her eyes. She walked over to Buffy, "This isn't goodbye, because I'll see you again after this.ok?" Buffy nodded in agreement. "Ok." Dawn said, "I love you, and I want you to know.I couldn't have wished for a better sister.no matter what I've said in the past." "And I couldn't have wished for a better one either.I love you," Buffy replied hugging Dawn. Dawn released after a minute and walked over to Giles, "I don't know what we could've done without you.you've saved my life a lot," Dawn began, "thank you, for all that you've done for me and Buffy." "What would my life be without you two," he replied, "a little dull I dare say." Dawn smiled and turned to Willow and Xander, "I don't think there are words to describe how much I love you two.you have always been there for me and Buffy, thank you." "Hey, no problem, Dawnie," Xander said, "what else do I have to do?" "Hey, come on, you know you want to say it." Dawn teased, "say it, you loooove us." "I'm not sayin' it!" Xander teased back. Dawn punched his shoulder, "Party pooper." "What am I going to do with you two." Willow said smiling. 


	7. touching words between friends

Chapter 6 Words of a key.  
  
"We're not all going to make it," Buffy spoke breaking the silence; everyone looked at her even Spike, "So, if there's anything that needs to be said.say it now, because we might not see each other again after this." Xander looked at Spike, "Spike," he forced himself to say, "We both know we can't stand each other, but I just want you to know.I appreciate the things you've done for Buffy, just.thanks." Spike nodded understanding. Buffy smiled at Xander's words. "Buffy," Spike said looking down, "I'm sorry for all the stupid things I've done to you and yours.you always let me back in.and I will always be grateful." He trailed off. "I'm glad I did." she replied. Willow walked over to Xander, "I love you.you saw me, when no one else did.thank you." Tears fell down her cheeks. "I love you too, Will." Xander replied giving her a hug. Willow walked over to Spike, "I'm sorry we didn't give you a chance.everyone deserves a second chance.I should know, I tried to end the world and they forgave me.I'm so sorry for ever distrusting you." "Hey, no worries, Red," he said and smiled slightly. She smiled and then walked over to Buffy with tears streaming down her cheeks. She hugged her. Buffy began to cry too. "I love you so much, you have always been there for me, and you never judged me.when everyone else did." Willow said but had to stop to fight back the tears. "I love you too, Will, you are an amazing person.and an amazing friend." Buffy said. Willow walked back to where she had stood before. Buffy walked over to Giles, "You've been like a father to me, you are my real father in my book." Giles looked down, also fighting back tears, ".Thank you." he managed to say. Dawn walked into the room, "My turn." she said looking around. Buffy nodded not even saying a word about how late it was. "Spike," Dawn said walking over to him, "you've been both a brother and a father to me.you treated me like an adult when everyone else didn't.and I always felt safer with you than anyone else." ".Take that back" he replied joking about a former conversation they had had. Dawn smiled as tears filled her eyes. She walked over to Buffy, "This isn't goodbye, because I'll see you again after this.ok?" Buffy nodded in agreement. "Ok." Dawn said, "I love you, and I want you to know.I couldn't have wished for a better sister.no matter what I've said in the past." "And I couldn't have wished for a better one either.I love you," Buffy replied hugging Dawn. Dawn released after a minute and walked over to Giles, "I don't know what we could've done without you.you've saved my life a lot," Dawn began, "thank you, for all that you've done for me and Buffy." "What would my life be without you two," he replied, "a little dull I dare say." Dawn smiled and turned to Willow and Xander, "I don't think there are words to describe how much I love you two.you have always been there for me and Buffy, thank you." "Hey, no problem, Dawnie," Xander said, "what else do I have to do?" "Hey, come on, you know you want to say it." Dawn teased, "say it, you loooove us." "I'm not sayin' it!" Xander teased back. Dawn punched his shoulder, "Party pooper." "What am I going to do with you two." Willow said smiling. 


	8. the decision

Chapter 8 The decision  
  
The war had started; Buffy heard Spike yell her name and she turned around to see a briliant flash of light and as her eyes adjusted she saw Spike there at the sorce of the light. Everyone around her fleed as the vamps dusted from the light. Buffy ran up beside him. "I can feel it, Buffy!" Spike said when she reached him. "What?" she asked terrified. "My soul. It's really there.kinda stings." he said. The began to cave in around them. "Go on, then." He said looking at her. "No, no you've done enough! You could still." she started but he cut her off. "No, you've beaten them back," he said, "best for me to do the clean-up." She heard Faith yell for her to come on but ignored her. "Gotta run, lamb. Guess it's safe to say, school's out for the bloody summer," he joked. "Spike!" she said in terror. "I mean it," he said seriously, "I gotta do this." Buffy reached for his outstretched hands and laced her finger's in his. "I love you." she said, tears in her eyes. "No you don't.but thanks for sayin' it." he replied and the ground beneath them shook, "Now go!" She let his hand go. "I choose him!" she yelled looking up, "I choose Spike!" Buffy awoke in a bus, "Where.where am I?" she asked touching her throbbing head. "You're on the bus.you got a pretty bad hit on the noggin' down there," she heard Xander's voice say. "Spike!" she said sitting up, "did he make it???" Xander stepped to the side to show an unconsious Spike laying behind him, "He should come to sometime soon.but, Buffy, there's something weird about him, now.he's not cold.he's hot." "It worked," she whispered. Xander looked confused but just then Spike started coughing. Xander walked over to him and Buffy looked up toward the ceiling, "Thank you." she whispered, "Thank you so much." "Buffy," she heard Spike whisper in a horse voice. She stood up and walked over to him, "I'm here.I'll always be here." He smiled, still keeping his eyes closed, "So, you really were listening." "Yeah, you gave me strength that night." she said, "Spike, I have to tell you something." "I'm listening." he said, his voice improving. "You're human." she said as a tear fell down her face. "What?" he said opening his eyes to see the room flooded with light, including him. "You're human, now." she explained, "there were these god's that gave me a choice, they said I had to chose which souled-vampire would become human.and I chose you." "I realized something.I realized I really do love you.and I want to be more than your friend." "We could never be more than friends, Buffy, you know that." he said. "No," she said, "I think we could.and I'm intend on finding out if I'm right." She leaned in and kissed him. Xander looked at them but didn't say anything. He walked out of the bus to give them some alone time. "Xander, what's going on???" Giles said seeing the two through the window of the bus from outside. "Buffy's getting something she's needed for a long time." he answered, ".someone who loves and understands her." 


	9. A new man

Chapter 9 A new man  
  
Spike stood at the edge of the crater that was once known as Sunnydale while the others sat around the campfire or sat in the bus; they had yet to figure out what to do now. He heard some footsteps coming up behind him and turned to see Willow standing there, "So many people died in there." she said looking into the crater. "Yeah," he said also looking into it, "I didn't see who all died due to my whole near death experience." "I am really sorry about what I said, you know?" she said looking at him, "I was just really stressed." "I've had much worse said to me, love, no need to worry," he said still looking at the crater. "Still." she said but Spike cut her off. "It's ok." he said looking at her, "I know." She smiled and said, "I get why Buffy loves you so much, now." A half smile formed on his face, "Thanks, red." Buffy awoke the next morning to find Spike not there. She looked out the window and smiled. She walked out the bus door to see Spike standing there watching the sunrise. She walked up behind him and slipped her hand in his, "It's beautiful isn't it?" she asked. "It sure has been a while since I've seen one of those," he said quietly. "Feel any different?" she asked looking sideways at him. "It's hard to say." he answered looking at her, "I keep expecting to wake up, you know?" "Yeah," she said. "Don't worry," he said taking his hand away, "I know what comes next." "What do you mean?" she asked confused. "All is forgotten.you don't have to worry.I know the drill," he explained, "Nice things are said when the world's gonna end and then all is forgotten when it isn't." "What are you talking about? I." she said but he cut her off. "I don't need the bloody speech again," he said his voice rising just slightly, "I'm not a complete idiot. It's the same thing over and over, nice words are said but I've learned not to get my hopes up because every time you give me the same speech telling me it was a mistake." "But it wasn't." she said turning to face him, "I meant every word I said." He looked shocked, "Who are you and what have you done with Buffy?" "I've changed." she said looking serious, "You are walking proof that people can change.you inspired me to be true to myself and to follow my heart.and my heart has been screaming out something to me for a while now, only I didn't hear it." "What's that?" he asked tilting his head slightly to one side. "That I'm in love with you, Spike," she said and took a step toward him. "Are you sure about this?" he asked trying not to get hurt again. "I've never been more sure about anything in my life," she said looking into the beautiful blue eyes of the man she hadn't ever let herself really see before. She leaned in and so did he and they kissed gently at first. It was the most important kiss she'd ever had, and the most longed for by both of them. They pulled away slowly. "How about we go for a walk once we find a place to stay," she said quietly, "just you and me." "I would love that," he said softly. There was something different about him after that. Where there once was cold, emptiness in his eyes, there was now warmth and happiness. He was a new man.  
The End. 


	10. a letter to the readers

My dearest readers,  
  
I would like to thank you for reading my fanfiction. I would also like to express my apologies for the writing style I have used; my computer messed up so that it would show me that I had spaces where they were supposed to be but when I entered them into the web site it wouldn't show them. Again I apologize for my very stubborn computer.  
  
Thank you,  
Thebuffster14 


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